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There was so much hype around the 50 Shades trilogy... and like a sheep, I followed the crowd with aplomb. Personally, if I were casting, I would play Ana - with my penchant for anything kinky and my brunette locks. If you like fantasy escorts, I'm right up your street and can play any role perfectly.

I don't think sleeping with a millionaire with "issues" is too far from the minds of many bored housewives. Oh, that's another role-play fantasy escorts scenario... the bored MILF being entertained by the ripped handyman. Now, all the handypersons I know look more like Ricky Gervais than Ryan Reynolds, but we can overlook that for now.

So, why do we find fantasy escorts so fascinating? My clients love me to dress up in as many outfits as their imaginations will allow. I have been a serving wench in an old-style pub, a naughty waitress in a five-start celebrity restaur,nt; a 1950s housewife in Kensington, and an upper-class member of the mile-high club (that one wasn't too hard to act out!). I've even sported various accents in our trips abroad – French, Italian, Russian and Swiss (which was quite challenging but did involve fetching a blonde wig with pigtails a la Heidi). I figure that if someone is paying for me to accompany them, then they get to make the rules up. And if they want something a little bit different, then it is up to me to make it authentic.

So now I'm looking for a leading man to act out my deepest escort fantasies. I quite like the idea of the Dom-Sub role play, but with me being the Sub rather than the Mistress. Geoff, who calls me for erotic humiliation, would instead I spank him than the other way around - but I wonder how he'd cope with a riding crop and a blindfold? Much as he adores cleaning my toilet with a toothbrush and having my spiky-heeled boots walked up and down his back, would he come into his own in a Red Room of Pain? If the worm turned, would I be as thrilled as my creative mind wants? 

Maybe I should give him a call?

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